


To Hold You Again

by angelmariecloud



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: Absent Parents, Alternate Universe, Crew as Family, Destroy Ending, Dysfunctional Family, Family Drama, Hospitalization, Injury Recovery, Major Character Injury, Multi, Self-Worth Issues, and the Catalyst, cause it was annoying, only the Reapers die, sort of
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-01
Updated: 2015-03-03
Packaged: 2018-03-15 21:45:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3463136
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angelmariecloud/pseuds/angelmariecloud
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Shepard was certain defeating the Reapers would kill him. But Kaidan promised to fight like hell to be with him again. As Shepard recovers, he and Kaidan face the return of Shepard's parents, the price of fame and establishing healthy relationships with the the dysfunctional crew that Shepard calls family.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

To Hold You Again

"I'm gonna fight like hell to hold you again." Kaidan to Shepard.

One

Shepard's POV

It worked. It actually worked. No one thought that it would, especially me. After my encounter with the leviathan; which scared the crap out of Kaidan, I began thinking. If we could find the Intelligence, the entity controlling the Reapers we could destroy it and stop them. I asked EDI to create a virus to wipe out the Intelligence once Kaidan let me out of his sight.

EDI asked why I wanted to kill the synthetic that created the Reapers. I told her about the programming it betrayed, the preservation of life.

"It doesn't matter if the life is synthetic or organic, EDI. All life is worthy of preserving. This one is nothing more than a psychotic serial killer. It's killed trillions, maybe more. Countless lives lost because of it. It's earned the death sentence because I wouldn't let a murderer go free." I'd told her.

"I killed people."

"Defending yourself EDI. There's a difference."

"I'll find a solution, Shepard."

I smiled. "Thanks EDI."

It was easy to keep the hologram talking once I knew it was the synthetic I was looking for, I gave EDI the time she needed to finish the virus.

"Why'd you do all of this?" I asked.

The Intelligence spoke of a galaxy wide experiment spanning millennia.

"You were charged with the preservation of life!" I yelled. There was a brief pause.

"We realize we were in error." That's it you little shit, keep talking.

"You were in error?!" I demanded. "How many lives have you taken? Not just organic lives?"

"The number is higher than you can comprehend."

"Try me." A beep. "Tell me something, why hide in the Citadel?"

"It was a necessary part in order to provide you the necessary information to make your choice."

"Do you know what humans used to do to mass murderers?"

"Humans have always had a violent history."

"So you know that I can't let you off for the crimes that you committed."

"I am eternal, you are not."

I punched in the code EDI sent.

"Eternity is cancelled." I said as I hit the execute button.

"NO!" It shrieked. The Citadel rocked violently.

"Sayonara bitch!" I crowed gleefully. My glee was short-lived and the next minute I was on my back, as the room I was in began raining down pieces of the ceiling. I managed to avoid some of them but not all. My legs were buried under a mound of rubble, pinning me to another mound. A smaller piece hit me on the head and I blacked out.

That was two hours ago. My vision is blurred and my whole body hurts. Kaidan is the only thing I can think of and how crushed he'll be that I'm going to die. I tried to move, but none of my limbs obeyed me.

It took a few minutes, but I finally managed to get my arms to move. I needed to leave a message for Kaidan. The smallest of movements caused searing agony. I don't know how I got my omni-tool open and the recording app to start but I did.

"Kaidan..." I whispered. My voice was hoarse, rough and sounded like I'd swallowed glass. "If..." I hesitated, swallowing hard. "If you're listening to this, help came too late for me and I'm gone."

I shut my eyes, it was hard to concentrate. "You know how much I love you. I always have, since the moment we met and I will always will." I shivered, I was so cold and so very tired. "I need you to move on, find love, maybe have a couple kids and take your mom to see the galaxy. Please tell everyone that I couldn't have asked for a better, or crazier family. Deliver these messages for me.

Tali: Build your beachfront house and teach Garrus how to swim. Garrus: I'll wait for you at the bar. Liara: Retire from this dangerous life... Have lots of beautiful girls. James: You're gonna make one hell of an N-7.

Javik: It's been an honor fighting beside you. Jake: There's no such thing as a perfect father, but you'll make a great one. Miranda: Take Oriana on a road trip, bond with her. Jack: You're an amazing woman, and you'll find someone that'll worship you.

Zaheed: Forgive yourself and forgive the past. Kasumi: Score a big one for me..." I laughed, maybe I was delirious. I had no way of knowing if the virus killed EDI and the Geth "Joker: I'm so sorry about EDI. Karin: I never had a mom, but you were the closest thing I had."

It was hard to breathe and concentrate. I turned off the recorder. "I'm sorry Kaidan..." Everything went black.


	2. Rescue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kaidan looks for Shepard.

Two

Kaidan's POV

Shepard did it. The Reapers stopped attacking our forces, and self destructed.

"The Virus worked." EDI said. The Citadel shook violently a moment later. Oh God.

"Alex!" The word was out of my mouth before I could stop it. I love him so much and he was on that station. Pieces of the Citadel broke off and my heart stopped. "EDI, find the commander, now!"

"The station is unstable, Major." EDI said, it was a reminder of what we were witnessing.

I moved to run the scan myself and a strong set of arms wrapped around me.

"We can't get on there, Elvis."

"I'm not leaving him there!"

I struggled but James held on tight. Part of me knew he was right, but I couldn't do it again. I couldn't leave Alex alone, abandoned by the people he loves. The last time cost us two years. "We'll get him out, I promise."

James sounded how I felt. The Citadel stopped shaking. James released me and we watched as chunks of the station fell to earth.

"Can you locate Shepard?"

I waited while EDI scanned the Citadel, I chewed on my cheek while I waited for an answer.

"I've located the Commander's cybernetics, but I'm not reading any life signs."

"Where?"

"Above council chambers."

I moved away.

"Have Doctor Chakwas be prepared, I'll be back as soon as I can."

I didn't know what I expected to find, and the rate I was going I was heading straight for a court martial but I couldn't, wouldn't abandon him. The citadel was a mess, rubble everywhere, the keepers were scurrying back and forth trying to repair it. "Alex!" I yelled.

It might be futile, Alex might be dead despite his promise to me. Or he could be too hurt to reply. There was no way to tell if I was heading in the right direction. "Anderson." I whispered. There a few feet from where I stood was the first person that gave a damn about Alex as a whole person.

I ran to his side and brought up the diagnostic app on my omni-tool. Anderson was gone, a fatal gunshot wound and lack of treatment. This was going to be hard on Alex, if he was still alive. Not too far away from Anderson was another body.

Must be the Illusive Man. "Normandy, I've got two bodies here. And I can confirm that the Illusive Man is dead."

"Copy that, Major. We're sending search and rescue teams to the Citadel." It was James that confirmed the rat bastard's death. He'd been shot in the head. The events beginning to unfold in my mind. The Illusive Man killed Anderson and Alex paid him back in kind, unless... Anderson's wound wasn't consistent with it, unless the round went through completely.

"You are twelve feet from Shepard's last known location."

"There's nothing else here." I said. I looked up, there were large chunks of the ceiling missing. "He's above me." The realization hit like a ton of bricks. "EDI, is there a way up?"

I scanned the room as I spoke, maybe there was a ladder leading up.

"There are Keeper tunnels to your left." I moved quickly into the keeper tunnels. "There is a ladder two feet in." I followed EDI's directions to the level above. It was a series of catwalks. There near the end was Alex.

My heart stopped. Alex was halfway buried under rubble, his eyes shut and he wasn't moving. Alex's face was swollen, one eye completely closed and badly bruised. He was pale and I couldn't see his chest moving. I don't remember moving.

Next thing I knew, I had Alex gathered in my arms. Alex made a sound like a whine.

"I've got you, sweetheart. I'm here." I whispered into his hair, shutting my eyes and silently thanking whatever force saved him. One of Alex's hands clutched at top of my abdominal plates. He was awake, it was cruelty with all the pain he was in.

"Hurts." He gasped out. "C-can't b-breathe."

"We're going home now." I soothed, petting his hair. I eyed the rubble, there was no way I could lift it, biotics or not. I needed help. "I found him. But he's pinned. Can't free him alone." Alex was shivering, his face contorting in pain.

"A Geth ship is on the way. ETA, five minutes."

"Hear that, Alex? You'll be out in no time."

"C-cold." I lifted him again and just held him.

"I know, just stay with me. We'll be home soon."

Alex held onto the plates again. His armor was still on in some places, completely gone in others. I held him, cradling his head.

"Kay..." He whispered. He moaned and stiffened. Something was very wrong. The next moment, Alex began seizing. I almost panicked but I stomped it down. Now was not the time.

"No, Alex don't do this, stay with me!" I set him down and realized that I missed a dangerous injury. There was shrapnel in the left side of his abdomen. Shit. I applied medi-gel and Alex whimpered, going still. Please hurry.

The Geth lifted the rubble easily and I was able to carry Alex back to the Normandy. Alex looked terrible when we were in better lighting. Injures I missed easily visible. Doctor Chakwas met me and Alex was in surgery moments later.

I paced, worried. The others waited with me outside the med bay.

"Kaidan, exhausting yourself will not help. Shepard will need you calm and rested. You will need to be strong for him." Liara said, calmly. How can she be so calm?

I sat down on the nearest chair. If Alex died because I didn't pay attention, I'd follow him. An eternity seemed to pass while we waited for Doctor Chakwas to tell us something. Tali and Liara held onto each of my hands.

She looked tired when she came out. It was never a good sign when the doctor was tired after dealing with a patient.

"How is he?"

"Lucky. The piece of shrapnel missed some of his vital organs. And I've managed to repair the damage done. It's his cybernetics that worry me. I've done what I can but I need to contact Miranda Lawson."

"Is he awake?"

"No. Thought he might be more comfortable this way. He's in pain but heavily sedated, he feels less."

It was disappointing but at least Alex wasn't in pain. That's all that mattered.

"Can we see him?"

"Don't disturb him, let my patient rest."

"Yes ma'am."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> James calls Kaidan "Elvis" cause of the hair.


	3. Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I don't know how much time I lost this time.

It's always disorienting, waking up after being asleep for a long time. There's no way to tell how much time you've lost, how much you missed until someone tells you. There's the feeling that your eyelids weigh on ton and feel like they were glued shut at one point. There's the arbitrary feeling that you're missing something that no one wants to tell you. The feeling that you aren't going to like what you're gonna hear.

Kaidan is the epitome of patience. He never yells at me, never loses his control. It makes me wonder how badly I was hurt. Miranda was here this morning while Kaidan dozed on a chair next to my bed. She wouldn't tell me either. Kaidan has been better than I deserve, he doesn't even get angry at me when I lose my temper. He just soothes me until I calm down. I don't know how much time I lost this time.

Kaidan said he'd tell me when I was feeling more like myself. What the hell is that supposed to mean? How is he so patient with me? Kaidan's been sent to get some rest and Jack popped her head in.

"Stop scaring the shit out of us."

"No one will tell me what happened."

"I'll tell you what I know."

I nodded. "That's fine. How long have I been unconscious?"

"In and out. You broke your body and the citadel. The damn cheerleader had to come and take out all the tech she put in. She saved your ass, again. In total, you've been here for almost a year. Shit Shepard, next time you want to scare us, just pop out from behind a sofa or some shit."

"A year?"

"Well, you were on the good crap for most of it. Haven't you wondered why you aren't crying in pain yet?"

She was right.

"Thank you, Jack. No one was telling me anything. Did everyone survive?"

"Well, the only one who bit the bullet was the Illusive Man. To bad we can't revive him to kill him again, the asshole. What do you remember?"

"Sleeping with Kaidan."

Jack made a face.

"Ew." I tried not to laugh at her. Kaidan was a patient person, Jack definitely was not. "Sure, laugh. You get one free pass."

"Not laughing at you Jack, I promise. I know better than to annoy biotics."

"You're a biotic, dumbass."

"Not as good as you."

"Kiss up." She said grinning.

"You know you love me." I quipped. "I'm the irritating brother you never had."

We spent the next hours talking about random stupid stuff. Jack was unconventional from the start but I found a kindred spirit in her. It hurt to laugh, but I didn't care. Doctor Chakwas kicked her out after the umpteenth time one of the alarms went off. "Later losers." She said as she made a beeline for the door. I never understood that word, beeline. Bees don't fly in a straight line. 

Kaidan arrived as she was leaving.

"I'm glad you're awake and feeling better."

"Jack got kicked out because we kept setting off the medical equipment. She was going to help me escape."

Kaidan smiled and kissed my head.

"My beautiful trouble maker." He said fondly.

"Am I that bad?"

"You hung up on the council."

"Joker told you, huh?"

"Liara did. She was stunned by that tidbit of information. I thought it was hilarious."

"They were giving me shit."

"I know. They always gave you shit."

"Where are we?"

"A hospital just outside Canterbury. When you're more recovered, my parents agreed to take us in for a while."

"Your dad's okay."

"You saved his life. You saved everyone."

"Didn't do it alone."

"No, but people have been sending flowers and cards since you arrived. You're a hero."

"Marry me Kaidan. Just us, and the crew of the Normandy."

"I will. But let's concentrate on your recovery for now. I'm going to dance with you on our wedding day."

"Can't dance."

Kaidan smiled and kissed my eye lids one at a time.

"Then I'll just have to teach you." He said quietly. "Now, get some rest and I'll see you when you wake up again."

"Yes sir, Major Alenko sir."

"Cheeky brat." He said with a laugh.

"Stay with me?"

Kaidan sat at the edge of the bed and held me close. I put my head on his chest and just listened. Ever since Mars, since the beginning of our relationship I slept better hearing his heartbeat. He was always content to indulge me in this, I guess he likes holding me as much as I like being held by him. In his arms, I didn't have to be strong and fearless. In his arms, I could pretend that there was no one else around. He was and still is my safest place to hide, my sanctuary. I love this man that loves me.


	4. Unsafe

Unsafe

Alex begged me to go get some rest for the night. “I’m okay Kaidan, I'm well looked after here and I’ll be fine. You need your rest.” I leaned in and kissed his forehead. He made a humming noise.

“I can sleep in one of the chairs.”

“It’s okay. I’ll probably just be sleeping here. Go home and get a full night’s sleep.”

“How’s your leg?”

“Hardly any pain thanks to you.” Alex had a rough day, it was clear in his face and I didn’t want to go. The moron to put it mildly that was his physical therapist pushed Alex too far too soon and Alex was hurt as a result. Alex’s entire right leg cramped so badly that it caused the muscles all to lock up. It took quick thinking to keep any damage from occurring. After massaging out the cramp, I chewed out the therapist. I kissed Alex and nodded.

“Good night sweetheart.”

“See you in the morning.” I turned to leave and said good night to the nurses. I was almost to the sky car when I realized that I left a data pad in Alex’s room. With a sigh I turned back. “Back already Major?”

“I left something for work in Shepard’s room.”

“You just wanted an excuse to come back.” The tone was teasing and the petite brunette winked. “Not that I blame you, he’s very handsome.” I laughed and shook my head, walking down the hallway to Alex’s room.

“Ah, Major. I wanted to talk to you.” Alex had round the clock care and several doctors looked in on him from time to time.

“Hello Doctor Sarts.”

“I understand that you requested a new physical therapist.”

“I did, immediately after this morning’s session. He pushed Alex too hard this morning. His entire right leg locked up.”

“That’s not good. I'll push the therapy session later to get another therapist. And I'll have him put on a mild muscle relaxant.”

“Thanks doc.” I said, and opened the door. There was a man dressed in black standing at Alex’s bedside, smothering him with a pillow. Alex was thrashing and a muffled wail came from beneath the pillow. Sarts ran for help and I used a biotic pull to slam him into the wall. Then I ran to Alex. Alex was coughing and crying when I pulled the pillow from his face less than a second later. His face was red, his lips had lost some color and he was shaking, hard. Alex let me hold him close while he calmed down.

Security arrived to take the assassin away. Alex wasn’t safe here anymore. Someone wanted him dead and they were going to try again. Maybe not tonight, but as soon as they realized that they failed. I needed to get him somewhere safe. I let the night staff fuss over Alex to be safe and make sure that there was no lasting damage.

“I'm taking him home.”

“I don’t recommend that Major. He needs round the clock care.”

“Someone just attempted to murder him. If we hadn’t entered, he would have died.” I said sharply. “I’m leaving with him in twenty minutes. Don’t make me pull my Spectre authority to do it.”

It took fifteen minutes for them to unhook Alex from all the machines he was attached to and Sarts shook his head.

“Major, this is a mistake. You will set back his recovery. Nothing will change your mind will it?”

“No.” Alex looked exhausted and I wasn’t going to force him to endure a long flight home. When we arrived at the tiny prefab, I arranged most of the pillows to make sure he would sleep well. 


	5. Santuary

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kaidan and Shepard retreat to a safe location.

Sanctuary

Kaidan carried me to the sky-car the next morning. I was in pain and he gave me something to help me deal with it. I still didn’t know who the man that tried to murder me was, and I didn’t know what he wanted. He didn’t say anything to me. He just slammed the pillow over my face and held it down. I was so scared, and the last thing I thought, was that Kaidan was going to be all alone again. I tried to fight but I couldn’t even manage to get free. I think I began to scream. The next thing I knew the pressure was suddenly gone. The feel of biotics being used made my own biotics stand on end and there was the sound of a body hitting the wall. Then the pillow was pulled away to reveal Kaidan’s face.

I began to sob, realizing just how close it was to never being able to see his face again. The sobs triggered a coughing fit. Kaidan gathered me into his arms and held me. It was an assassin, but there was no way to tell who sent him, I watched from the safety of Kaidan’s arms as he was taken away. Kaidan held me as if he were trying to shield me from more harm. Then he released me to let the nurses and doctor look me over. 

“I’m taking him home.” He sounded angry, but I could sense it was because he was scared.

The doctor wasn’t pleased at all. He told Kaidan as much. Kaidan snapped back that I wasn’t safe and that if necessary he would pull his spectre authority to get me removed. They were disconnecting the many different machines and then Kaidan was wheeling me down the hallway and then into the sky-car. We went to the small pre-fab that they gave to him during the time I was in the hospital. He piled pillows up on one side and laid me on it, covering me with a blanket.

“Get some rest, sweetheart.” He said gently. I fell asleep quickly and woke up to Kaidan packing and getting ready to leave. “You’re awake!”

“Where are we going?”

“Somewhere safe.”

“Okay.”

“I’ll get you something to eat first and then we’ll go.”

“I’m not hungry.”

“You’ve got to eat something. I’ll make something light and easy.”

“I’m sorry, I just...please?”

He softened. I knew that pulling the puppy face would get me my way. With a sigh he began to transport things to the sky-car. Then he came to get me, putting me in the passenger’s seat with a mound of pillows and a blanket to keep me warm. It was only when we were in the air, I realized that no one knew where he went with me, only because Admiral Hackett called to find out why I was gone from the hospital. Kaidan explained about the assassin and that he was taking me somewhere safe but couldn’t tell anyone for fear for my safety. It took several hours to get to Kaidan’s parents’ orchard.

Kaidan’s mother came out when she heard the noise and her eyes went wide. Kaidan did look a lot like his mom. But then his father came out and I realized I was wrong. He was a perfect mixture of the both of them. Kaidan smiled when he saw them and got out of the car. They were talking but I couldn’t tell what they were saying. Then Kaidan opened the door and his father knelt beside me.

“He looks pretty good. Has he eaten today yet?”

“No. Tried to get him to eat, but he wasn’t hungry.”

“Good thing your mother is a good cook. I’ll help you bring him in and set him up on the sofa until we get the room set up.”

Kaidan’s father helped me to my feet and they both walked to the house. I was very tired by the time we reached the couch.

“I’ll set up the room and you can bring in the rest of your belongings.” A thought occurred to me.

“Kaidan? What happened to my space hamster?”

“He’s okay. Joker and EDI are watching him until you’re well enough.”

“And my fish?”

“Tali attached the auto feeder. They’re fine. You need to concentrate on getting better.”

I nodded, slumping against the couch. “Okay. I’ll be in an out but you can see me from here. I’ll be right back.”

“Are you hungry? I made some soup.”

“Soup?” I echoed. Kaidan’s mother was a beautiful woman, even aged as she was. She smiled at me. “I guess I could try some.”

“Are you allergic to anything?”

“Cherries, I always used to joke with Kaidan that I would never get to enjoy Black forest cake.”

She laughed, charmed by my words.

“You are a charmer. I’ll be back soon with some soup.” She left and I watched Kaidan as he made several trips to the car and then to the house, arms loaded with bags. After a few moments his mother came back with the soup. I ate slowly and she kept me company.

When Kaidan was done, he joined us on the couch.

“You got him to eat. He wouldn’t eat this morning.”

“I’m good sweetheart.” She told Kaidan, grinning. I snickered and her smile widened. She nodded at the empty bowl and took it away. Kaidan smiled and shook his head.

“You ready to get moved.”

“I can walk.”

“You’re already tired, sweetheart. I’d feel better if you’d let me carry you.”

“Can we compromise? I’ll walk a bit and when I get too tired, you can carry me?” I gave him my best puppy eyes. He sighed and nodded.

“All right. But if you get tired, you have to tell me.”

He helped me to my feet and I wobbled, falling against him. He wrapped his arms around me, one over my waist the other behind my shoulders to right me. My heart fluttered in my chest and I struggled to think. Why is it always so hard to think when he’s around? Didn’t he know how sexy he is? He has such an unfair advantage. “Whoa.” He said, grinning. Ladies and gentleman, please ignore the little puddle of goo on the floor that was once famed Commander Shepard, he was melted by Major Alenko’s sun level hot smile. “Alex?” He said. I kicked myself mentally. I was not making the best first impression with his parents.

I smiled back at him.

“Good thing I’ve got a big, strong marine to save me from embarrassing falls.” He laughed, the way he’d laughed during our forced leave on the citadel.

“If you’re looking for big and strong,” He said, his voice light and teasing. “Maybe you should have dated Vega.”

I grinned.

“Nah, I don’t think he’s into that.” Kaidan laughed and finally righted me. His grip shifting to support me for our trek. I could have cried for the loss of body heat. I asked the doctor when our sex life could resume and he said as soon as I was able to do it without any pain. Kaidan is willing to wait until the end of time for me, but I want to be able to just be with him it doesn’t even have to involve sex. If he’d just lay with me in the bed. The trip was mercifully short and Kaidan helped me onto the bed.

“Are you sure you’re okay? Your heart is racing!”

“I’m okay. My heart always tries to escape my rib cage when I’m around you.”

His eyes went wide and I felt like an idiot. Then they softened and he kissed my forehead.

“Love you too sweetheart. I promise when you’re feeling better to take you on a real, actual date.”

“You mean all the time we spent in the field wasn’t dating?”

“Alex,” he said, his voice low and seductive. “Husks aren’t exactly romantic. Though seeing your tight ass was a bonus in that formfitting armor.” I shuddered. It’s not fair he can get me to shake like this just by his voice alone.

He tucked the covers around me and stepped back. “Get some rest. It’s been a long day for you.”

“Good night Kaidan.”

“I’m right down the hall if you need me.”

I dozed for a while. When I woke up, I could hear Kaidan arguing with someone.

“I understand that Admiral, but you have to understand my position. He wasn’t safe there. There was an attempt on his life, when he was supposed to be under protection.” Wait, he was arguing with Admiral Hackett? I’m really a bad influence on the guy. And didn’t he already speak to Hackett already? What the hell was going on?

“Cerberus didn’t stop simply because it’s chief supporter died. They’re out for his blood.”

“And the only way to protect him is to take him somewhere safe.”

“You’re too close to him to do a proper job of protecting him.”

“He’s in a safe location right now and I personally encrypted my line so the signal bounces off different sources.”

Kaidan sounded angry and annoyed. I needed to do something before it ruined his career.

“Kaidan?” I called out. There was silence for a moment. 

“I’ll call you back.” Kaidan said. When he opened the door, he was composed and outwardly calm. “Hey, you’re awake.” He sat on the edge of the bed.

“I have trouble sleeping without you.” I said.

“I know, it’s just until you’ve recovered more motor control. I got a therapist that makes house calls, wanted to reduce the risk of someone trying to hurt you again. I already ran a background check on her. And I had Garrus vet her. He seems to like her and he’s a good judge of character. She’ll be here in a little while to evaluate you to see what you need to do.”

“Good and thank you.”

Kaidan’s mom appeared in the door.

“Sorry to interrupt, but the therapist is here.”

“She’s early.”

“Sorry, I had a cancellation and I thought we could do with a bit of a longer session just to get to know one another.” A pretty, dark haired woman said. She had long brown hair, sharp green eyes and freckles. She wasn’t tall but she wasn’t short either. “I’m Sarah.”

“Alex, and this is Kaidan.”

“Nice to meet you!” She was friendly, happy. “So I don’t have your file, so tell me about what happened to you.”

“I was injured in the war. I got pinned by debris and some cybernetics I had malfunctioned.” I said, keeping it brief. She nodded.

“Okay, so any weakness on any side?”

“No, but I was in a coma for a year.”

“So your muscles all locked up. Got it. We’ll let’s start with some manual testing to gauge how to proceed.” She gripped my legs. “Okay, try to push up.” I tried but they didn’t come off the bed. She nodded and scribbled down in an actual paper notebook. He left hand was set between my knees. “Squeeze your knees.” That was a little bit easier. She nodded and wrote in the notebook. “Push apart.” She said, her hands on the outer part of my calves. She wrote in the notebook again after I tried. She did a few lower body then switched to my upper body. When it was over, she finally spoke.

“So, your muscle tone looks good considering what you went through. You do have some lingering weakness but I don’t think you’ll be with me very long. We need to work a little on building your strength. You were working with someone before me, right?”

“Yeah. Real assole, pushed too hard and then my right leg cramped up.”

“Ouch. Well if you promise to give me a shot, I’ll do better. We can do all of this from here. But for now let’s start slow. Kaidan, is it? Can you help me get him on the yoga mat?”

“I’m capable of walking short distances.”

“I know, but let’s do some warm up exercises before we get to that. I’m not gonna make you do any weight training yet. And when you’re done Kaidan, sit against the wall over there.”

Sarah demonstrated the warm-ups for me and corrected me with a hand whenever it was wrong. They didn’t hurt. And soon we were finished, she was helping me to my feet. We walked a little with Kaidan watching from the sidelines. With each stumble he made to get up from where he was sitting. But a glare from Sarah kept him where he was. She was scary. The circuits were short but after a while she let go of me and I managed a few steps on my own. Before I stumbled and she caught me with ease. She was strong for someone so little!

“Great job, Alex. You’re gonna be a little sore tonight so, ice it in fifteen minute intervals and have this handsome man give you a massage.”

Kaidan turned pink, it was so cute. “I’ll see you tomorrow Alex, you get rest and eat some good eats.”

“Thank you Sarah.” She grinned. “You’ll be back to your normal self in no time, Alex.” Kaidan escorted her out and then came back to sit with me on the bed.

“I’m proud of you, sweetheart.” He said.

“So, can we have sex now?” I asked hopefully. He chuckled and leaned closer.

“Alexander Shepard, I’m surprised in you. You’re a naughty, naughty boy.” He said quietly, his lips close to my left ear. Not fair, not fair, so not fair! He chuckled and the vibrations made me shiver. “Whatever am I going to do with such an ill-behaved boy?” My brain shut off and I could feel the whine escape.

“Please.” I begged. He kissed my left ear and bit down gently on the lobe. It was being jolted with electricity. He ran those calloused hands down my arms and they broke out into goosebumps. “Please.” One of his hands ran down my spine the other slide down to waistband of the loose sweat pants. Then it slid inside. Yes, yes!

I realized then that I was hard for the first time.

“Well, I think your body is definitely telling me you’re ready.” I really wanted Kaidan. He nipped playfully at my throat. His fingers wrapped around my erections and gave a few tugs. I clawed at his arm. The sensation too much to handle, with the amount of time that passed since anyone touched him.

“Ahem!” Someone said behind them. “If the two of you are done acting like teenagers at prom, dinner is done.” 

I felt like cursing. I whimpered as he pulled his hand away. “I expected you to behave better, Kaidan!” Kaidan turned red and he grumbled as he pulled away.

“Mom!”

“Don’t you ‘mom!’ me young man! I know you’re attracted to him but there will be no teenage shenanigans in this house.” She said. I wished the floor would open up and shallow me whole. Here I was, in Kaidan’s parent’s house and I’d been caught making out with him like a couple of horny teenagers.

“Mom, could you please just give us a minute?”

“There’s nothing I haven’t seen.” She said airily. “But I’ll give you ten minutes.”

“Sorry about that sweetheart.”

“We really need to figure out a way to not get caught.” I said. He kissed my face.

“Think you can calm down in only a few minutes?”

I groaned.

“I can try. I’m not happy.”

“I know but maybe when we can pick this up later?”

“I’m really a bad influence on you.”

Kaidan laughed and stood up.

“Think you can face them after that or would you like to eat in here?”

“As long as the awkward silences stay to a minimum I think I’ll be okay.” I said. When it was obvious after five minutes that I wasn’t going to calm down with him still in the room, he left to let me calm down. It was tempting to touch myself but I wanted it to be special. It took longer than ten minutes to calm down and Kaidan came back in when I called out to him. “Alright. All ready.”

“I’m glad.” He said. He carried me to the table and sat me on a comfy looking chair.

“Glad you could join us Commander.”

“Alex, sir. You can call me Alex.” I hedged. I could see Kaidan moving out of the corner of my eye.

“Well then, Alex, you can call me Robert and I think it’s okay to call my wife Marie.”

“Well, let’s eat.”

I stared at the plate, they were so welcoming. Kaidan smiled at me. His parents were good people, far better than my own. I wondered what it was like to have that kind of support, freely given without the expectation of something in return, like it was when I was picked up by the Reds. They gave me a home and a family but in return, I was expected to do what they wanted me to do. It also made me wonder and not for the first time why my parents didn’t want me. I was four when I was left abandoned in the corner store on Lexington and 3rd Avenues. My parents never showed to claim me from the police station or from the orphanage I was sent to and no one had ever seen me in that neighborhood. I vaguely remember a little girl from that age, was she my sister or was she a neighbor? So many questions that would never be answered, even if my parents were alive, they didn’t care.

“Alex? Are you okay?”

Damn it, he reads me too well.

“Just not used to being around people’s parents is all.”

“It’s okay, I think they like you.” He said, squeezing my hand. I was lucky to have found someone that thinks the world of me. Doubly lucky, because his family is kinder to me than I deserve.


End file.
